The One You Gave Away…

Dear “Mom”,

How dare you….

How dare you come now, now that the monster in my closet is gone and Santa clause is no longer real.
My first dance already passed and I already have my own collection of heels

How dare you come now… after all the work is done,
I feel so selfish even acknowledging you;

You don’t know my imaginary best friends name , even though she knows all about how I secretly, I longed for you.

How dare you come now…now that I can read my own bedtime stories or paint my own toe nails
Even though I never said it; I know the emptiness that true pain entails
It was you….

What did I do?
What could’ve I said to make you stay
That one wish youre allowed every birthday
…Well mine was always to know of you

How dare you?

You don’t deserve me.

You won’t ever know who thought I was pretty in school
And after my first break up how I felt like a fool

You never chased the boogie away or told me my room was free of ghosts
…Instead you feel like one

You show up with very little explanation but I can’t stop myself from letting you in.

And even though you’re my strongest pain, biggest fear and deepest challenge within
I’ve prayed for you since I can remember and desperately waiting for the healing to begin.

The one you gave away

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